Another Year, Another Waiting Game

It's been another year, and I am still not teaching. In fact, I'm not in the Master's program anymore because of that. It felt like asking a doctor to explain how to do surgery without ever actually having performed it before.

Although I am no longer working for minimum wage, I am still in retail, working for a company I swore I would never work for again. However, it is a different place and a different time, and though it's not teaching English, I still teach on a daily basis. It allows me to tap into another one of my passions (this time, photography), so to some extent it keeps me happy. I like my job - but I love my career and want it to start so that I can get that special fulfillment in my life that I miss so much.

I've been tutoring a couple of middle school students once a week to keep myself sharp and make a little extra cash. It has helped a lot with my need to teach, but it's just grammar and writing, not literature. I want to read beautiful poetry and literature and break it down and show young minds how to understand and love it as much as I do. I want to teach.

I want to teach.

The Woes of Recessions from the Eyes of a Teacher

School starts very soon where I live, and it is something I am constantly reminded of at my job. No - not my teaching job, my retail job. Why on earth should I have to work for minimum wage with my education and certification? Honestly, I think about it every day and it makes me miserable. What's even worse? One of my former students came into the store I work at and laughed at me.

Sigh.

At the Close

This is a journal entry I asked my Juniors to write for me, and the response that I wrote to read to them.

Your Junior year is very quickly coming to an end. Next year, you'll be seniors! This is a very important period in your life. Many of you (I hope) will be thinking about college and life after high school.

Take some time to reflect on this past year at Katella, and how you've grown. What important life lessons have you learned? How have you changed?
Tell me what your goals are for your senior year and after. What colleges are you interested in? How excited are you to apply as an English major? (just kidding... maybe!)


This is my "journal" to them:

I've learned a lot about teaching this year. For example, as much as I wanted everything to go perfectly, it never will. Students will always be late, not do work, cheat, and make up excuses. Another thing I learned is that you can't make everyone care. I know these sound really negative, but for me, they're not. I, for a while, felt like I was a failure because I had students failing. But now I know that even the best teachers can't reach every student.

More importantly than all of that, I learned that I really was meant to be a teacher. Watching kids succeed, fall, struggle, and pick themselves back up again and being around to help is very fulfilling. I love challenging students. But most of all, I get to be the center of attention and talk about how much I know - which is fantastic for my ego.

My goals for next school year? Get a job, and do well in my masters program! Not much, but they're both extremely important!

Nothing to do with teaching, but...

I have started my food-blogging up again, and I am doing it here this time. Find me at http://jackie-cooks.blogspot.com.

The Final Stretch

With my personal life taking every bit of my emotion and energy out of me, I'm starting to struggle in this final stretch of time for teaching. It's difficult to care when I know I'll never see these kids again, and probably won't step foot on that campus again. I know it wouldn't be this hard if people didn't have terrible timing. But right now... How am I supposed to feel motivated to teach when it takes me 15 minutes to even motivate myself to get out of bed everyday?

This is the email I received today.

You have met all of the necessary requirements to receive a recommendation for the following document.

Credential: P5--(Preliminary): $29.50 Single Subject Teaching Credential
Issuance: 05/29/2009

In order to complete the filing process, you must take the following steps:

1) Proceed to https://teachercred.ctc.ca.gov/cctc_phase3/InteractionMgr?interactionmgr.interaction=Enter_ApplicantLogin
2) When prompted, enter date of birth and social security number to prove identity.
3) Complete a short online form.
4) Pay the credential fee using Visa or MasterCard debit or credit card.

When completed, the application form and fee will be sent to the California Commission on Teacher
Credentialing, which reserves the final authority to grant or deny a credential.

Certified by: Kristin Luzzi

I Make Them Think

I am not the only student teacher at my school. There is another, and she goes to a different University than I do to get her credential.
I was speaking with her on Friday, in the copy room, and she asked me about a particular student. We talked about him for a minute, and she told me that she knew him from outside of school. She asked me about him because I guess they had talked about me, which automatically would make me uncomfortable, of course. Anyway, the point is, he said he didn't like me, and that he likes their old teacher (my master teacher) more. Why is that?

Because I make them think.

I suppose, if there was any reason to be disliked, that is a good one for me.